Life's Lessons

I don't know where to start. 

Well, I haven't been living that long but have decided to "key" down a tribute to what life has taught me, my very own life's lessons. 

The first thing that comes to mind is death, a rather morbid topic to start off with. It kinda feels like dejavu, like I've posted something like this before... brb... oh it seems there was indeed. My post on November 9, 2007, The Fragility of Life. 

I guess what sparked me to write that post was that a couple of people close to me passed away. But nothing "beats" having a close friend going over to the other side (which I'm hoping there is indeed a better other side to go to) at the age of 28. He was a close friend of mine, who battled cancer for more than 2 years, whom I've went through Poly with, though not that close, but became much closer in University. We've spent good and bad times together during our days in NTU and during his day of passing, the seemingly locked up memories just seemed to all slip right back. 

Even when my maternal grandfather passed away a few years back, I didn't recall being this devastated, first because I wasn't that close to him, and probably because he had suffered from a prolonged dementia and his deteriorating health preped us for an imminent death. In a way, when one reaches that golden age, the only way up, is down. 

It affected me a lot because during my fren's years of recuperations, I've always assumed that he would recover, get all healthy and we would be able to hang out, chill out, as healthy individuals. But it struck me, that life is indeed unpredictable. If you've managed to read my post till the very end (it's gonna be a long long post), you'll probably understand the impact of strong but passive words. 

How many times have we came across awesome quotes, only to register them for a day, before we start forgetting them, only to slip right back when we come across it again? How many times have we read thought-provoking quotes which make you go "wow, it relates and applies to my life", wrote it down, tried to remember it, but have it locked away in our minds 'waiting' for it to slip right back when the time comes? So when will the right time come? It's like gambling, it's a game of luck. It might come soon, it might never come. 

And finally how many times have we registered those awesome quotes because we strongly feel towards the "true" meaning of it and make it part of our beliefs, and true inspirations? Only when it happens. What's "it"? It's abstract, "it" is like a feeling of love, you can't see it being there, you just feel it, sense it and embrace it. 

After beating around the bushes of words, I'll be forthcoming and tell you this, the true value of words come only with a price, that cannot be brought with money but with experiences. 

Knowledge is Power. Well, we've all heard of that before, but we don't really appreciate it only after being given real knowledge. The kinda knowledge that not everyone is exposed to, the kinda knowledge that not everyone can learn, the kinda knowledge that we know can either make the world, or break it. Magic has exposed me to the "hidden secrets of life", not one of deceit, but one of wonder. It has taught me to think out of the hat, and by mixing Science (my major) with magic, it made me a "hungrier" person, to push me to ask the "right" questions. How do we know what are the "right" questions to ask? Experience & Knowledge is your answer.

So if anything my close fren's death has taught me, is to cherish life. We've heard of it all too often, but do we really practise it? We all think we're infallible, and get complacent because nothing has "yet" to happen to us. We think the unfortunate will not fall on us, and that even if they do, we have the strength to overcome them. If you've been living like that all your life, it's time to face reality. True, there's a possibility that nothing bad will happen to us, that we'll be able to live a ripe age and pass away with glam. But there's also a possibility that you realise you have cancer and spend the next few years fighting it only to let it take your life away despite all the inner strength you think you might have. 

Life is all about luck. There are proven (I think, I'm lazy to verify the sources) ways to live longer, living a more carefree life, having a healthier diet, exercising etc. Well, my friend looked rather carefree, his diet wasn't bad and he's a regular exerciser, but guess what, death came early nonethless. By doing all the above mentioned, it doesn't gurantee a longer life, it just increases the odds, just like a game of luck.

After his death, he has really taught me to look at things in perspective. In Singapore it's true we don't really have much of a choice but to work our asses off, unless you're one of the "luckier" ones born with a silver spoon in your mouth or have worked your asses off during your earlier years and your efforts have paid off and are enjoying life right now. But you still did work you assess off didn't you? 

Having a mini-"excursion" with my wife at Sentosa Cove made me realise how unfair life was. Sentosa Cove had really grand houses which the ordinarily rich would not be able to afford, but the extremely ones would. No wonder they say Singapore is a playground for the rich. Sentosa Cove was like a fake utopic town with few inhabitants but deceptively unguarded bungalow houses with "everything" an ordinary person would wish for. A roof top garden, a pool, a backyard with a docking port for your yatch which leads out to the sea. After experiencing the population count of Sentosa Cove, I can only make an educated guess that the multi-millionaires and above have bought houses there to treat it like a holiday resort. The houses don't even look like resident houses but more like a resort for a weekend getaway. 

Well, back to reality, even though I was truly envious of such a lifestyle, I mustn't let my power of knowledge get the better of me... that life is unpredictable, and extremely vulnerable. 

My appreciation of life has increased by limitless folds, that I find the most intolerable circumstances of my life becoming a mere child's play obstacle course. Regardless of how tough the journey of life gets, treat it as a game that you'll have to play, before you can return to your "real" life. 

My wife and I are huge fans of the reality hit US series, Survivor, but we weren't so only until recently. We decided to check it out (I've only caught Season 1, missed out a good 10+ seasons and finally became a fan) and realised it's no longer a game about a millionaire dollars, but a "game" to "cheat" your way to a milionaire dollars. 

Of course you can try to win it fair and square, but what is fair and square in the context of Survivor? Survivor of the fittest? Or a suvivor of the smartest? Neither, it would seem. Most of the seasons, the winners are "undeserving", because they didn't take charge of the game, and weren't strong at challenges. That way, they wouldn't get on anyone's nerves and would not be seen as a threat. Also, it's a game of false trust, backstabbing and there's lotsa politics. Dirty politics. No such thing as honor in the game of survivor. So why are there so many fans for the reality hit series since it's such a "dishonest" and "dirty" series? 

Initially, we were hooked because of the new game plays by the new participants each season, some eye-candies here and there, and how interesting, exciting and unpredicable situations would crop up now and then. But I realise it wasn't just because of that. Well at least on a consicous level it was. But on a subconscious level, the reason why Survivor has so many fans is because it reflects life, real life. Some of the participants might be acting, to spice up the series, but ultimately, after being stranded on an island for close to a month, their "true colors" show, the true nature of humanity. 

Because as audiences, we get to see the overall picture, but the players don't. I thinik it's even more interesting to put ourselves in the player's shoes because we won't know when someone actually backstabs us (like in real life) and whether who our truest friends really are. 

Which of course, also explains the great success of the hit series Game of Thrones, which has just finished running it's 3rd season. I initially hated it. The first season made me not wanna watch it, because the true hero died an unjustified and horrible death. Where is the justice in this world? Well, here's news for you, there ain't any. Most of the corrupted practices go uncovered, while most of the ones abiding by the rules have to suffer. 

The essence of game of thrones is about politics, sex and backstabbing. How things could be manipulated if given the right ingredients and the harshest of realities, goodness does not and will never triumph over evil. That's just made belief, by the fairy tale stories we were told when we were younger and the false premise that the bad will get their ill deserves and retribution will strike them like God's fingers. 

If that was true, there wouldn't be corruption, murders, rapes, backstabbing, and all the blardy crimes out there. Why are some murderers not found? Because they were hit by a car while crossing the road? Struck by lightning on a stormy night or was stabbed to death by a rogue vigilante? Dream on my friend, for them to commit such crimes, they wouldn't have what we superficial call a "conscience" where it in fact it's just a presence of guilt, and they wouldn't fear retribution or being haunted by the vengeful spirits of the victims they kill. Whether such things exist is another discussion topic altogether, but ultimately, one of life's lessons is that good guys finish last (I'm sure you've also heard of that quote before). 

One has to be moderately good and bad at times, to strike a balance. But even if you're a personification of evil, it doens't mean that you will lead a more miserable life of suffering, you might even be owning a house at Sentosa Cove for all I know. Of course, it's a stereotype, for my jealousy, because I'm quite sure there are also clean multi-millionaires and billionaires out there who had gotten to where they are now by generations of hard work and sweat (yup, I don't think a lifetime is enough, it's like growing a tree, the only way it can develop to a full grown tree in 5 years is either there's some artifical fertilisers or it's not the same "tree" we thought we planted). One such owner had recently hit the headlines, for the wrong reasons and guess what, I wasn't a wee bit surprised. NKF, Ren Chi and then City Harvest. NUS Law Prof, CMB and even an MP. The causes? Game of Thrones sums it all. 

And the main reason why I'm pinning down my thoughts in this post is because of something which happened at my workplace today. I experienced a distasteful act of verbal backstabbing, and thought to myself, even though it didn't happen to me (or my dept, of course this is all based on assumptions since I shudder to think that my dept's "backstabbing" had already taken place since I had a inkling about it a few months back for reasons I shan't disclose because we all know that the internet isn't safe anymore, or was it ever?). 

It was bad, real bad, from my principles point of view, and it was as if I experienced an act of word poisoning. Do not underestimated the power of words, poison words work their way slowly to your heart and mind and unlike an audience of a reality series, you won't know it until it's too late. Worst still, most people don't even know even after it's too late. That's how "evil" the world is. To be more accurate, that's how evil the human race is. I don't blame it on the world, but on my own species. 

I could also choose to go down that path, as long as I accept the knowledge that nothing bad will happen to me even though I do bad, and doing good doens't mean I'll suffer less. I could be more accountable to myself, but that's just plain egoism. However, I've seen how strong words are, and in many instances they could act as poison, in others, as medicine. Words heal, and bring laughter to the world. They heal not just physically, but also spiritually, and emotionally. 

You're suffering from a headache? Well, try taking paracetamol. Words. Think that there's no meaning in life but death? Well, let me tell you a story about the human spirit... Words. Feeling down? Let me tell you a joke. Words yet again. 

Words are like money. There's an abundance of it. But not everyone has a fair share of it. And it's the root of all evil, only if one abuses it. It can be earned, with knowledge and experience. And by definition, words = power. 

PS.: None of the pictures used in this post are mine. I would like to give credit to the sources.

16 February 2012 - A New Me

I've always thought that what cannot kill me, will only make me stronger.

I've always thought that once you reach the bottom, the only way you can go is, up.

I've always thought that when the going gets tough, the tough gets going.

I've thought wrong. I've always thought wrong.

Despair.  (Noun) Loss of hope. Hopelessness. (Verb) To lose, give up, or be without hope.

Melancholy. (Noun) A gloomy state of mind, especially habitual or prolonged, depression.

Lachrymose. (Noun) Suggestive of, or tending to cause tears; mournful.

Lugubrious. (Adj) Mournful, dismal or gloomy, especially in an affected, exaggerated, or unrelieved manner: lugubrious songs of lost love.

Hmm... nothing seems to really describes how I'm feeling now.

I'm just... empty. There's this emptiness inside of me that I don't think will ever be filled up.

Perhaps I was blind before, for believing my eyes were opened to the hidden beauties of life. Perhaps I was blind before, for believing that love transcends everything. Perhaps I was blind before, for believing that I will never be alone again. I've thought wrong. I've always thought wrong.

The irony in life. A word in the "ban list" of 2012 for being misused and abused one too many times. Irony.

Murphy's law states that what can go wrong will go wrong. But his law doesnt address why when something goes wrong, everything else goes wrong. I mean, it everything else goes wrong, then it's "right". But if what can go wrong will go wrong, then it should be wrong, right, wrong, right, right, wrong, wrong, in no particular order or pattern. But no, Murphy's law is only superficial. It only scraps the tip of the ice berg.

It's like saying, the grass is greener on the other side. The sentence indirectly states and "promises" a negative outcome. So, the grass is always greener on the other side? Or is it really? If you go over to the other side, and it is, then the sentence doesnt make sense, because the now "other side" where you once came from, isn't greener. But if the grass isn't greener on the other side, then the sentence itself doesn't make sense. Either outcomes results in a lose lose situation.

My life kinda feels like that right now. A seemingly positive statement, a seemingly positive outcome, yet, I know deep down inside, the outcomes will always be negative. A positive outcome which comes after will only result in yet another negative outcome. I'm bitter, I'm despressed, I'm empty, I'm... numb.

The funny thing is, I don't even know if being numb, is even a good thing? Does it mean that I'm strong? Since I can be so numb to sadness and despair? Or does it mean that I'm weak, since I cannot be happy from the sadness?

I've always thought that what cannot kill me, will only make me stronger.
I've always thought that once you reach the bottom, the only way you can go is, up.
I've always thought that when the going gets tough, the tough gets going.
I've thought wrong. I've always thought wrong.

Truth is, if one ever reaches ultimate despair, it doesn't even kill you. You're just too tired to be "killed". You just... become... numb... zombified, robotified. Does that mean, that, I'm stronger?

When I've reached the bottom, I realised there's actually another way down. An alternative route. Does that mean I've found an alternative path? A path of "englightenment?" or endarkenment? If the new routes you find keeps leading you down, does that mean I haven't reached the bottom? Or does that mean no one else has ever reached the bottom before, to claim such a fallacious statement?

When the going gets tough, and where everyone else struggles to keep up, I stop, zombified, robotified, inching forward, walking lifelessly, aimlessly, and blindly following the path, does that make me tougher than the others who's desperate trying to keep up? Are they stronger? Or weaker because they don't wanna be left behind, are afraid of how people will look at them and just wants to conform with the majority? Does stopping, make me weaker than the rest? Or tougher than the rest?

Perhaps I was blind before, for believing my eyes were opened to the hidden beauties of life. Perhaps I was blind before, for believing that love transcends everything. Perhaps I was blind before, for believing that I will never be alone again. I've thought wrong. I've always thought wrong.

What if, my whole life was a lie? If I thought I was actually more "open-minded" than everyone else because I stop to look at or find the hidden beauties of life? What if, all these while, I'm just being delusional? What if beauty doesn't exist? What if love isn't the one that blinds? What if beauty is the true reason for keeping your eyes shut all these while?

What if one day you realises that love is not even close to the top 3 most important things in your life? Seemingly thinking that it was ur top priority your whole life? What if, your whole life was a lie? Love transcends everything? What a load of bull. Money? Hormones? Stuff which are uncontrollable, are the true elements which transcends everything, they are the true rulers of your life.

What if you thought friends, family and your loved ones would fill up the hole in your heart? And doesn't? Then what happens after? What do you look for? What can make you less lonely? What can make you more complete? Hobbies? Work? Porn? What really fills emptiness?

What did "emptiness" used to be filled with? How could you fill up the emptiness which was never filled in the first place. In that emptiness you once thought never existed, exist now because of what you have, because of what I have. Does that make what I have the cause of my emptiness? Or are my eyes more opened to the emptiness which once lingered?

In a twisted fairy tale of my own, I was once blind to the hidden emptiness which lingered inside. But now my eyes are opened. Thanks to everything that surrounds me with. But now that I have found "emptiness", I'm stronger, I'm much much stronger because I'm numb. I'm so numb, zombified, robotified, that I no longer feel. The whole world's a stage, or a movie.And we are merely actors. And I'm the farking lead zombie.

I'm sick of people throwing shit at me and putting me in shit. I'm sick of how another human being is so easily corrupted with money, power, status and authority and abuses them. I'm sick of not being able to voice out to anyone or on any platform but to my new found friend, "emptiness". I'm sick of feeling hurt because I don't want to love you anymore, only to find myself hurting more than actually loving you.

But no, as depressing as this post seems, I'm not sick of living. In fact, I'm so numb, I'm just going to actually start living with numbness from now on. All that crap about being the difference, becoming the difference, gives false meaning in life. The true meaning in life, should be how to numb your way through life, so that at the end of the day (end of your life), you know that you have walked a thousand miles with the only friend you'll ever have... emptiness.

Oh my lovely sunshine.

Just today my female colleague was complaining about the scorching sun around 1pm. Well, I didn't quite like the afternoon sun as well, but I told her, enjoy it as the sun gives us vitamin D. She told me that the afternoon sun was bad. And so came the qns when is the sun good then? She replied, "Morning! and Evening!". Then there was.... this post..... I mean, I thought to myself, isn't the sun the same sun, morning, day or evening?

Checking out Google, it proved to be a fairly difficult task to debunk this so-called "myth". Well, from wikianswers, it would seem that the sun is safe until 10am, after which it becomes bad for health and causes burns as well as the feared skin cancer. The sun is safer after 4pm. Well, at least this was what was quoted. One source, statistically, that's an insignificant result. Afterall, there's no scientific proof to prove that, or is there?

Source: http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Is_there_any_difference_between_morning_and_evening_sun_rays_on_health_grounds.A_scintific_explanation_please.

Hmm... it would seem that the sun does play an important factor in gardening. Perhaps by examining the reasons and rationale behind them, we can derive with a more "definite" answer. As quoted from a forum, and since I'm lazy to type everything down again, here's what's being said about the morning, mid and evening sun.

"Morning sun side - sunflower / 'fake' dill / 'real' dill / local lavender / moneyplant / mother

-in-law tongue / 1 hanging petunia / mint / air plant

Under the shade of morning sun - all the ferns / small asparagus (either hang high high or behind a shadow or very short exposure of the light)

Mid way (bright area no direct sunlight, - money plant / mint / all 'in the process of propagation plant' eg HL de mullberry temporary stays here sometimes a bit of west sun near the wall for - wondering jew / spider plant / asparagus / aloe / petunia + 1 unknown plant

Evening sun - periwrinkle / roselle (i think so) / pandan plant / mosquitoe plant + i unknown plant / petunia"

Not sure how accurate this info is, but I guess there's no smoke without fire.

Source: http://www.greenculturesg.com/forum/index.php?/topic/13966-am-sun-vs-pm-sun/

When I searched for "morning sun vs evening sun scientific proof" all I got from Google was the existence of God. Side tracking a little, this "sun" thing made me reminiscence about a conversation I had with a couple of my close friends when I visited my best pal's new house. We were talking about new houses, and about whether the house gets any morning or evening sun, and started discussing a bit about Fengshui. I'm not too sure about it, but from what they told me, the general consensus is that there's 2 schools of thought for Fengshui.

Vaguely put, one is more on the overall direction, the other is about the direction in which the sun comes in from. Where the sun comes in strongest, that's the "front" door (even though it may be the balcony). Confused? Don't be, cos that's the best way I can structure my explanation since I'm fairly uncertain myself. Shan't "research" about Fengshui for now... cos I know it's open a door I can't close shut behind me once I do.

Well, from my astronomy classes back in University, I knew that Auroras or Northern lights are actually caused by the harmful solar flares or solar wind from the sun which hits the thermosphere (high altitude atmosphere). Ie. Beauty it is true indeed, as northern lights are evidence of our Earth protecting its inhabitants from the harm. It's almost like the Earth is a round spartan holding an invisible shield and blocking off any fire spears hurled at it.

It's sad that the sun will die in 5.2 billion years from now, since it's life span is only 10 billion years and 4.8 billion years have already passed. Though we would be dead by then, the thought is indeed shuddering. One can imagine what will become of our godzillionth generation.

Ok, I think I might have side tracked a little too much here. Any more of this and one would think my religion is Sun-ism. While there might not have scientific or clinical evidence out there which compares and measures the effects of the morning, midday and evening sun, one can only use general knowledge to solve this "mystery".

We all know for a fact that the afternoon sun is more hotter than the morning or evening sun. This is because the sun is higher up in the sky and there's nothing to block off it's crazy UV radiation. We know that the sunrise and sunset is caused by the atmospheric refraction of the sunrays as it rises above or below the horizon. You can find out more about the differences between dust, dawn and what twilight even means from the link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dawn or you can just figure it out from the picture I ripped off from wikipedia.

Bottomline is, I assume, that it's similar to taking a flash light and shining it directly into the eyes of someone as opposed to using your body to shield off some light and let the remaining light sip through at an angle of your body. Of course the latter would be less glaring for the other party. Works in the same concept I believe, and while the amount of sunlight might not totally equal the magnitude of UV radiation, I believe there's still some slight correlation between them. Less light will result in less UV radiation. No light from sun will mean that there is no UV radiation (I think), since it's hard to imagine UV radiation bouncing off our skins at night. Cos many have said that even though it's a cloudy day, one is exposed to UV radiation... well, that makes sense since there's light from the sun.

So, in summary, while the Sun is mostly good for health, I can only assume that it's true... that the sun is more hazardous to our body midday as opposed to the morning or evening sun due to its intensity and position in the sky. Though there's no scientific evidence to show this, I believe common sense wouldn't fail us, or me here. However, this is only true to humans. Skin cancer and all that sh**. Can't give the same conclusion for animals since there's always an exception... plants are proof of that.

Either way, I love you Sun. It is in your presence that keeps me awake, that makes me feel alive. There's a scientific explanation for this of course. About rhodopsin, of how it's responsible for both the formation of the photoreceptor cells (found in our eyes) in the presence of light. It is this that makes us feel more awake in the day. Well, I'm sure you're aware that if one is exposed to to prolonged periods of darkness, one will gradually become blind. (Actually, I don't even know if that's a myth or not... too many things to find given this short amount of time!!) Hmm, then come another question... if that is true, then is being exposed to too much daylight one of the causes of night blindness? Night blindness is known to either exist from birth, or caused by injury or malnutrition. Perhaps, too much rhodopsin causes a chemical adaption which results in night blindness as well? Would a sporty person be more likely to suffer from mild night blindness as opposed to a "normal" person?

I could keep rattling on, but I shall end off with this stay-home message. We cannot blame the sun for the bad it does to us, we cannot thank the sun for all the good it has given to us. Because the sun is merely just being itself. The sun is simply a ball of ferocious ball suspended in space, and waiting for time to claim it's life. It is like us humans, we cannot be blamed or be gratified for merely existing. Yet as we humans can be appreciated for our presence, we too can appreciate the sun for it's presence. Oh my lovely, sunshine...

I don't wann-a Beeeeeeeee.....

This afternoon while lunching with my colleagues at a nearby chicken rice stall, we encountered something very unusual. There were 2 bees constantly hovering around us and freaked most of my female colleagues out. I too gritted my teeth because the bees were less than 5 cm away from us most of the time. Then after hovering for a good 10 life-threatening seconds, one of them settled on my coke can!

None of my colleagues were having coke, or any drink in that matter... and I felt threatened by the bee. Took my coke can and tried to shake the bee away, but it just kept flying close to the can. The bee was so close to my hand I could almost feel its breath!

I put the can down, and it settled on the top of my can. Chased it away again, thankfully successfully on the second try and quickly drained out my coke. True enough, the bee came and settled on the top of the can, sipping the drops of coke around the groove on top of the can. It was an upclose encounter with a bee "in action". It was quite an amazing sight to see it so close, and to watch the size of the drops shrink one by one. The bee "drank" a few drops before flying away... and coming back again... repeating the same routine for a good 3 times.

I could imagine why the coke can attracted the bee... the striking red probably reminded them of flowers and the sweet coke reminded them of nectar. But what was amazing was that I since coke was carbonated, wouldn't the bees burp after sipping them? Imagine a fly sipping up different carbonated drinks and burping as it flies from one place to another.

That was also when I thought to myself... I shall give myself an assignment when I get home today. How to ward off bees!! And so, the outcome? This post!!

The main gist is that smoke relaxes bees and make them less likely to sting, and that essential oils and plant herbs ward off bees. Apart from the usual insect repellent sprays of course. On the other hand, perfumes attract bees. However, in the situation I was in today, I don't believe any of the "shoo-ing" methods would have been useful to me.

Came across a relevant video though. I'm sure you've seen a couple of chicken rice stalls hanging transparent bags filled with water at their stall fronts, where they chop their meat up. According to the chicken rice aunty in NIE, she said that its just a belief to chase houseflies away and have worked for her. Well, it would seem there are some truths behind it. Just that probably the older generations continued to do so because its just a technique passed down from generations to generations. It would seem that scientific studies have shown that the "invisible" prisms reflected off the bags irritates bugs, not just houseflies alone.

You can check it out at:

http://www.ehow.com/video_4951462_repel-bugs-pennies-water-plastic.html

Just a short clip about a lady teaching you how to repel bugs by putting pennies in plastic bags filled with water. Similar concept, just that in this case there's additional pennies. Additional pennies, additional effects.. additional cost.

Then this idea (which just struck me) reminded me of another hearsay/belief. Ever wondered why people stick coins to cash registers and calculators? I have. I've heard that it has something to do with fengshui and will bring in more money. Did some google searching and ... well, not much info out there. It's plain simple. For luck.

Well, veered off a little there. Back to bees! Did you know that elephants can produce alarm calls to ward off bees? This discovery was made by a team of scientists from Oxford University and more information can be found at the link:

http://www.phenomenica.com/2010/04/elephants-produce-alarm-call.html

But it's actually more of alerting the tribe to stay away from the bees than to actually chasing the bees away. So, once again, interesting fact, but not relevant to my search for the answer.

It seems that all the "solutions" presented revolve around making your own bee repellents out of essential oils or planting strong smelling herbs such as thyme, spearmint and eucalyptus.

Based on these facts, if I ever see a bee a future, my best bet would be to get a bowl of hot soup, put it in front of me, and keep fanning the smoke around. (I absolutely do not condone smoking so even though the more obvious ans is there, I shan't even include it as one of my options.) Haven't tried it, but if anyone suay enough to encounter such a situation, and heng enough to try it, please do drop me a message to see if it really works.

Take home message of the day? And every other day? Knowledge is power. Wa la moments come from prior knowledge.

PS.: Photos are not mine and I claim no credit for them.

When the mundane gets going, the beauty starts to fade away.

Ever since I started work close to 3 months ago, my passion towards it has started to decline progressively. My satisfaction especially, it feels like "somthings/'s" just not worth it, it feels meaningless, it feels empty, I feel empty. Started coming home on time to get "things done" (not that I didn't get things done at work, but things done at work feels different somewhat), playing the guitar, watching movies, doing my magic... blah blah blah.

Well, though things might not have improved much, I've started to reach an equilibrium, an equilibrium of living to survive, vs actually living life. Today, I shall present yet another 3 wonders, "beauties" which came into my life, ever since I started to "search" for it once again... that satisfaction, that meaning which reminds me to keep living my life and not merely to survive it.

It was just like any other day, walking back from lunch with my colleagues passing through many people, many trees, many roads, many offices, many buildings. And whilst we were at Kallang Pudding Road, my colleague asked me out of the blue if I knew that a particular building was, as she pointed it out. I said, "Yup, I know. It's a Church." "Look at the unit number, isn't it interesting?"

I looked at it, and nonchalantly said, "Yeah, 60D. So?" ..... "It reads GOD!!"....

And I thought to myself, "OH MY 60D!!! How did I miss that?" I have been walking that stretch of road every day since I started work, I knew it was a Church as along, the unit number was so prominent, and yet, I failed to realize such an interesting fact!! This just shows that sometimes being observant isn't enough. The ability to connect seemingly "separate" things plays an important part in how we perceive beauty.

Everytime I got home from work, mentally exhausted, I would watch a movie or two. But it seemed that it was equally as draining, if not "meaningless". That's why my appetite for movies have dropped drastically and haven't been blogging much of them. However, I started to gravitate towards one of the my favourite past times which I was so crazily committed to a couple of years back... and behold... it is back indeed. My beloved classical guitar. The instrument which my girlfriend bought for me when we first got together. I loved playing the guitar because it relaxes me, even though I'm not good at it, and can't sing for walnuts.

Was checking out some updated songs to play since I too have been MIH (missing in hearing) from the modern music industry and came across several hidden talents online. I was flabbergasted at how nice their cover of songs were and spend an entire night (burnt some oil to stay up) browsing through them. Megan Nicole, Jason Chen, Tiffany Alvord, Cathy Nguyen.... OM60D!! Where have I been? What have Singaporeans' been missing? With all the blind publicity about the search of half-assed singers, there's actually a group of very talented singers and musicians online who would almost definitely hit straight to stardom should the media feature them.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwvMjiOCyqY

(Cover of Perfect by Pink: Jason Chen and Cathy Nguyen)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-zg9xS87wgU&feature=related (Cover of Who Says by Selena Gomez: Megan Nichole and Tiffany Alvord)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jzYen-3VU2Q&feature=fvwrel (Cover of The Lazy Song by Bruno Mars: Megan Nichole)

I've only attached the best songs sang by those talents, and apologise for any copyrights infringements if I accidentally breach them. But thought I share the vids with you. You can find all of them at youtube. Links after links of sheer music enjoyment. I take no credits for posting them, or making them, only for finding them in this "blind Singapore" that we live in.

And finally, today, when I was checking out my magic stuff online, I came across Hat Juggling. I knew of its existence, but never really did bother to check it out since Contact Juggling seemed more "relevant" to magic and looked soooo ccoooollll. But not until I came across Hat Juggling... This just opened my eyes to all the hidden talents in the world. Relating back to the singers online, I can't believe I was missing out on so much in the world. And therefore gave myself a "mission" or assignment... from now on, I shall start sharing the best of talent vids through my blog, not just to give publicity and recognition to talents like them, but to show everyone who's came across my blog, that there's just so many "beauties" in the world waiting to be

uncovered.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spofqnCGVOI

(Hat Juggling: Uncredited Russian?)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_rzRfBbVOo&feature=related (Contact Juggling: London Street Artist)

Look no more for diamonds, gems and the possibility of time travel. Look closer, look out for, and look deeper into our everyday lives. Start today, and if you choose rather to chillax at home, fret not. Because I hope to use as my blog as a window for such beauty. Oh wait, haven't I been doing that already? .....

All's not lost in a world of hidden beauty

For the past few months, I have captured several hidden beauties of life. Some may think of me as hyperimaginative, but I truly believe life brings forth its essence in the strangest of places, in the weirdest of times. And the only way to capture those moments are to immortalise them in pictures because a pictures dipicts a thousand emotions, and a picture glorifies the work of the unknown.

Captured at a wall in a carpark near Lorong Ah Soo (opposite of PLMGS)
What do you see?

Kinda looks like a little terrier dog to me.

Captured at Udders Ice Cream cafe at Bukit Batok Westmall
What do you see?

Reminds me of a fortune pig!! Or a fortune boar!!

Captured en route to Robertson Quay, shot taken along the pathway just outside of Clarke Quay Central.

Nothing much to see, but one of the most beautiful places to view the soft beating rays of our sunset.

Captured at TCC Cafe near CentrePoint at Orchard.

Supposed one of the best coffees in the world, first introduced to me by my friend bear bear, and it's my second try with my gf. Blue Mountain Coffee, from Jamaica it seems, the only coffee I've ever tried that doesnt leave a strong aftertaste. Mild and smooth, bitter but light on the tongue. Fragrant, taste like coffee (duh) with every sip, but doesnt remind you of coffee after that.

Captured at the mini dog park on the top level of Serangoon Nex Shopping Mall.

Possibly the most beautiful Chow Chow (fur-wise cos essentially they all look the same) I've ever seen. I've only ever seen black and brown ones, possibly a light brownish one, similar to this one but can vaguely remember cos I think the color of the fur wasn't that uniform. Not sure if it's a male or female dog but it likes to smell other dog's ahem... a****. Nonetheless, was such a rare treat for me.

Wokie then, that's about it. Will upload more "chance" pictures in the future. Capturing beauty isn't that difficult, but finding them is!! And sorting them out on blogspot is quite the tedious task as well!!

Where do we go from here?

Life's been so messed up lately, it's really hard remembering the "finer things in life". Some of which I have thankfully immortalised in my iphone, but many of which, will only remain as a locked up memory. I'll leave the photos for a later post (or earlier since it will appear above this), as blogspot isn't that friendly when it comes to uploading pics amidst a thousand word essay.

Feeling extremely down in my work recently, I received some advice, actually it's more of a reminder, a common quote from a senior which really made me realise how saying the right things at the right time is so important. As I sat down waiting for my turn for enquiries, he said to me... tough times dont last, tough guys do. It was so liberating and extremely enlightening. It was so hard hitting it was almost like throwing me an oxygen line when I'm suffocating at the bottom of the ocean. That incident really made me realise how important words are, and no matter how common words are, they have the potential to make exceptional.

The recent tsunami tragedy in Japan made me reminiscence about the September 11 crisis. When I first knew of it, the news didn't quite sink in... only when days later did I come to terms with the harshness and once again, the fragility of life. That's when it was a reminder to me to live each day as its fullest. We must never live a day of regrets, the important question to ask yourself is that if tomorrow never came, would you regret how you have lived? Regardless of how miserable or "forced" we feel, ultimately we have the final choice to walk the path of our own lives.

No one's really out there to look out for you, you're just stuck with yourself. Buildings may collapse, winds may churn radioactive rain, life may throw piles of manure at you, hope may seem but an apparition to you, but even in these times, you will always be you. As long as we don't lose ourselves, buildings may rise, winds can be deflected, manure can be fertilised and hope may even bring an angel to you.

What is there to really love about life? The answer lies closest to your heart. Only with the ability to love oneself, can one be able to love others, can one be able to love another, can one be able to understand what this elusive and illusory feeling is. It may, or may not be simply a chemical reaction in the body, but just like how we cannot predict our tomorrows to turn out, we cannot predict how love will control us in future... scary... yet exciting. It almost feels as if it's another entity in your body, you don't just try to live peacefully with it, or fight against it, you just have to co-inhabit with it.

Goals and dreams in life can be confused with another from time to time, and they might even intertwine or be engulfed by each other. Think of them as the yin and yang, they must c0-exist but cannot exist in place or another. There could be more yang than yin, or vice versa. Goals might turn into dreams from time to time, whilst dreams turning into goals might not neccesarily be that easy.

There isn't really any "finer things" to talk about in this post, just a couple of idealogies which I have been exposed to owing to the recent events that have happened to me. But the next post, will be my breakthrough post because I've noticed how wordy my blog is, and have decided to finally add some "color" to it. Because beauty put into words is poetry, but beauty put into pictures, is art.